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What I Really Want to Tell You- 11/2/17

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What I really want to tell you is how easy it is to sometimes feel “off track”. To get lost in time while everything bustles about even when physically going through the motions of moving right along.

 

What I really want to tell you is how I worry I’ll never live up to my full or even partial potential while simultaneously wondering if I have any potential at all.

 

What I really want to tell you is how sometimes I stare at the laundry and the lunches, the mayhem and the messes and think to myself I want none of it while in the same moment feeling immense love and gratitude for it all.

 

What I really want to tell you is for me life is a series of me too, and me too and me too moments. That I can often feel very alone and crave the moments of simple connection.

 

What I really want to tell you is I don’t know why I need to write these things down or why I really want to tell you them. I also want to tell you that above all else I value authenticity and there is a part of me that knows sharing what I really want to tell you helps me better communicate in all ways written and more.

 

What I really want to tell you is that for me art is the antidote to what sometimes feels like the chaos of the world around us. That the marks are my meditation and the paintings are often my prayers to try and make sense of it all.