life, sometimes it comes hard and fast
one blow, then another, and again and again
do you want to get up? can you? yes
how? choosing to
to choose love…
over a decade ago i lost a friend, a father, a brother, two old dogs, several pregnancies. all in a short period of time, within a year…
how does one recover? slowly
how does one come back? differently
what’s the secret? love
giving, receiving, being… LOVE
I wrote the above and posted it
on SoulRootingJoyRising right around the new year. I had just finalized
the concept for a fundraising show I was holding in memory of my deceased
brother. Just as I was growing more and more committed to this return
to my painting, my art, a huge part of myself...
The above explains the conversation I had with myself more than once over the course of the decade that had passed since all of these events started to occur. So the choice for love was clear, not easy, but clear… It was the only way to not only survive, overcome, move on... It was the way I wanted to live.
That left me in a predicament. Love? Crap... how does one depict love???
What does love look like? Is there a universal symbol? Was there a way to use my voice and language as a painter to convey it? What could people relate to because above all, this show, I needed to be accessible for people. For them to feel it, understand it on some universal level. So I pondered... what could I paint to address all of the above.
The answer came quickly, and at me again and again. I just didn't really like it.
"you must paint hearts."
"I DO NOT PAINT HEARTS! TOO TRIVIAL, TOO TRITE, SO NOT ME", I would answer.
and the answer, "you must paint hearts" would come again.
So I sat with it. I processed it. I refused to do it. Then I sat with, processed and came to terms with it. Then I sat with it, processed it and determined a way that I could do exactly that, paint hearts, conveying love, in my voice as a painter and feel good about it all.
#ichooselove was born. It grew and transformed. The show opened last Friday.
more on that tomorrow...